


Black Soap

by ZeroSanity



Category: No Fandom
Genre: Affairs, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Dark Soap Opera, Drug Use, F/M, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Recreational Drug Use, Soap Opera, Teen Romance, Tragedy, Underage Drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-18
Updated: 2016-06-18
Packaged: 2018-07-15 19:22:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7235338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZeroSanity/pseuds/ZeroSanity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James was so tired. He had just had a week of constant homework and assignments, the girl he loved was pulling away from him, his best friend was turning into an enemy, leaving him with no one to hold him up, no one to stop him from sinking past the point where mere self harm and occasional drug use could help. So the only thing left was an ending to his short life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Black Soap

**Author's Note:**

> My first 3rd person story. I had some trouble with sometimes saying 'I' and 'my' instead of 'James' and 'his'.  
> I lost control of this fast. I had no idea that that ending would happen until I myself got to it.  
> Enjoy I guess...

James sighed as he 'woke up', it's hard to wake up when you haven't slept to begin with. He had stayed up all night trying to finish his poor excuse for an English speech, he didn't even know what book it was meant to be about, he knew he'd read it but that was the limit of his mental capacity at the moment. He lit up a 'cigarette' as he struggled to get up. He glanced at the unfinished speech. It didn't help that he didn't even touch the pad of paper he was using to write the assignment, he had been busy. Arguing with his best friend Ben about James' love for Candy (it seemed that was all they did), and writing poetry about both Ben and Candy, this was what he mostly counted as his life, his sad excuse for a life.

As James finished his 'cigarette' he sighed and got out of bed. He noticed the small pike of ash just in front of his pillow and the ashtray on his bedside table was overflowing with butts of both 'cigarettes' and also actual cigarettes. He never remembered smoking this much, then again, he never remembered smoking actual cigarettes, he used to loathe the taste. He sighed as he pulled on a shirt (he was still wearing his school shorts).  
'Good morning honey' his mum said almost cheerfully as he walked down the stairs  
'Did you finish your speech' she quizzed  
'Morning, and yep' James quickly mumbled as he grabbed a muesli bar on the way out.  
He was halfway down the street to his bus stop when he released. He forgot his shoes. He groaned as he turned around to return home and get, his fucking, shoes. He did not need this shit now!

James sighed as he stared at the numbers. They were fly around his vision and dancing. The only reason he was here was because he didn't want another letter sent home.  
'James! Do some work! We have an exam next week!' the teacher exclaimed 'Your in Advanced Math! You need to do some work!'  
James just left, got out of there before I hurt someone.  
'James...' Kate (one of James' best friends and Ben's girlfriend) whimpered as James stormed out, leaving his math-fail buddy to fend for herself.

James turned up his music (a playlist of Oasis, Green Day, Get Scared! and Sleeping With Sirens) and moved to a more comfortable, shady, and hidden part of the roof. For now he could resist jumping off the 3 storey school block. He knew however, that one day he might not be able to avoid the temptation of an end of the road, the ultimate painkiller  
'Hey dude, what are you doing here? It's dangerous, you could hurt yourself or lose the game or something' James didn't even flinch as he heard the voice of the love of his life  
'Ahhhhh!!! I hate you' he laughed as he said this, they both knew it wasn't true (would have been better if he did hate her)  
'You all g?' Candy asked, frowning  
You're cute when you frown' he smiled  
'And you're a dick' she laughed  
James put his arm around her and guided her further away from the edge, he was always paranoid about Candy getting hurt. Candy laid down in the shade of one of the tall trees standing over the building. James laid next to her with his head on her lap. They laid unmoving like this for a while  
'You know how everyone thinks we're dating at first?' I quietly asked her  
'Yeah?'  
'What if we made them right?'  
'Eh...' James' heart almost didn't sink, he was expecting this, again  
'Eh?'  
'I've told you before, I don't want a relationship at the moment'  
'I know... It's just... I don't know' this is how it always went  
'James, you're a great friend. Can't we just leave it at that?', it sounded like an excuse to James  
'Is it him?' he instantly regretted saying this  
'Who?' Candy was getting annoyed as she got up from under James' head, which promptly dropped onto the corrugated iron roof with a thud  
'You know who...' the accusations kept flowing even though his tone was passive  
'Ben? Carl? Jason? Alex? Just fucking tell me!'  
'That's a fucking big list!' James didn't know why he was yelling, he could see he was hurting her, it was killing him to do this  
Candy just slapped James and walked off, climbing down off the roof. James was hurt, and not by the slap. He walked to the edge of the roof and looked down, the height would easily be enough to kill him if he jumped. He edged closer, and closer. Then, just before he went to lean over, he saw the his love walk past below. If he did this, she'd probably blame herself, he couldn't do that to her. As he went to back away from the edge, his foot slipped along the gutter. He fell, slicing his knee of the gutter. He then slid off the edge. He barely grabbed onto the edge of the gutter. It bent under his weight as the steel cut into his flesh. As the gutter bent, it grew harder to hold on to. He tried to pull himself up but had to move his hands out to either side to prevent himself from falling off, more blood poured from his hands, now moving down his arms and into his white school uniform. "Oh shit, that's going to be hard to explain" he thought to himself "if I can even survive this, that is"  
'Need a hand?', James heard along with quick, light footsteps of someone walking along the roof  
'Hey Ben. Yeah, probably, need a, hand' he managed to say as he struggled to hold himself up  
As Ben lifted James up James asked 'Candy didn't see that, did she?'  
Ben held his tongue about the fact that it was Candy who told him to go up there, instead he laughed and said 'Come on, let's get out of here. I've got a spare shirt in my bag, you sure you don't need shorts too?'  
'Next time I'll just let go' James laughed, secretly not kidding

As Ben and James walked home from school (an hour and a half early). They each thought about a girl. James thought mostly of Candy and what had happened, while Ben mostly thought about Kate. They were silent until James' phone buzzed, on silent as usual. He checked the text  
"Katee XD

Things between you and Candy ok? :/"  
As he read the text, his phone buzzed again. He swiped down and opened the new message, putting off replying to that question  
"Candy <3

I can't make it to that movie tonight  
Sorry, Carl's got some home issues ATM, he's staying at mine  
I'd come and bring him too but IK you don't like him so I'm not going to put you through that  
Sorry again Xx"  
Ben noticed James' hand twitching again and asked 'Dude, you ok?'  
'Yeah, of course' James said blankly as he replied  
"Candy <3

Yeah, of course, no problem, why would there be? :))", he then replied to Kate  
"Katee XD

Yeah, of course, no problem, why would there be? :))"  
'By the way, Candy can't make it to the movies, she's chilling with Carl' he notified Ben  
Ben shook his head 'Damn, you still coming then?'  
'Nah, no point, shit movie, it was Candy's choice'  
Ben chuckled 'Fair enough, guess there's no point to me going then. Oh well, I have to study for exams next week anyway'  
Another buzz,  
"Katee XD

Bullshit, BTW you're picking me up from mine at 6, my parents are going out and want me out of the house. So you aren't staying home, you're coming to the movies with me, you can choose the movie, but you're taking me to the movies whether you like it or not. Ben said he had a doctor's appointment and I am NOT going alone!!! >:-D".

At five to six, James' phone sounded an alarm set to remind him to go to Kate's. When the alarm went off, he was already halfway there. As he neared her house, he saw her parents car pull out and drive away. In the doorway of her house, looking lost, was Kate  
'What's up?' James asked, worried  
'Egh, my family, they left me here, no food, no money, nothing...'  
James hugged her 'Come on, I'll buy you food on the way'  
Kate smirked 'I said they didn't leave me money, not that I didn't have any, serves Mum right for leaving her handbag on the dining room table unattended'  
He laughed 'Nice'  
On the way to the movies, James' phone buzzed again  
"Ben

I hear you're taking Cate to the movies, thanks :D  
Anyway I GTG bowling with family as I said earlier  
Take care of Cate"  
He was confused, his phone buzzed again, he grew more confused as he read the second message  
"Candy <3

Ben just told me you're taking Cate to the movies  
Does this mean you're finally over me?"  
Ben was on a phone plan of unlimited calls and texts to Optus, $200 per month worth of credit for calls and texts to other companies. Candy was with Telstra.  
Cate noticed james' confusion, she grabbed his phone and looked at the text, she sighed  
'You said you guys were ok' she said  
'Sorry...' James didn't know what else to say 'I guess I didn't want you to worry'  
'Well I'm worried now' Kate said softly  
'Don't be'  
'Why not?' her voice became sterner 'You smell like alcohol', it's true, he had a couple of scotch glasses of vodka before he left, she continued berating him 'You've been really quiet, and whenever I mention Candy, even when I just mean as in literal lollies, you flinch like you've been slapped!'  
'Eh, hate it when you're worried...' James finally said  
'YOU'RE worried about ME?!'  
'Yes, what's wrong with that?'  
'You're the one with problems' she protested  
'You have problems too! We all have problems dudette! And besides, I've noticed you and Ben drifting apart, that can't be easy on you...'  
'Eh, it isn't...'  
'Exactly' I said softly as I hugged her  
'Come on, otherwise we'll miss the movie'  
'Yeah' I laughed

They saw something weird when they were just across the road from the cinema. Walking out, a boy and girl, around our age, with each others arms around each others' waists. Laughing together just like a true couple (which made both Kate and James depressed as they thought of their own unimpressive love lives), were Ben and Candy! Kate just stopped dead in her tracks  
'B-b-b-Ben?' she slowly stuttered  
'That son of a bitch' James said, starting to walk forwards  
'James, no, don't' Kate grabbed James' hand and held him back  
'Kate, let me go, that fucker has broken your heart, I can see it so don't try to deny it, so let me break his freckly fucking nose in return' James said darkly  
'What about Candy?'  
'What about her?'  
'Don't you want her to be happy? She wouldn't like it if you broke her b-b-boyfriends nose'  
'She'll get over it'  
'What if you get hurt?'  
'I'll get over it and she'll get over it more'  
'But I won't...'  
'What?'  
Kate sighed and pulled James into a hug.  
'You're one of my best friends, apparently my only friend now' she said shaking.  
James hugged her back.  
'Fine, I won't beat up your boyfriend, today' he smiled  
'Thanks' Kate said, looking up into James' eyes  
'So does this mean you're single?' James joked  
'Maybe' Kate smiled cutely

James woke up. "Jesus Christ that was a weird dream!" he thought to himself. He vaguely remembered details at the end. Him and Kate kissing, tongues dancing. He also remembered coming home with Kate, sharing a bottle of scotch he found in the fridge, she only managed one shot, he had the rest of the bottle, no wonder his head felt like a bowling ball struck by lightning. He tried to remember what happened after that. He vaguely remembered kissing Kate again, and what after that? He had no idea, he turned around to reach for his smokes. A beautiful face appeared in front of him. it was Kate. In his bed. It wasn't a dream he remembered, it was real.  
'Well shit' he muttered  
Kate groaned and slowly opened her eyes  
'What the fuck?' she asked, confused as James was  
'Apparently it wasn't a dream...' he remarked, as if she had the same thought  
'Apparently not' she smiled, she did originally think that the events she remembered were part of a dream  
'Well it would have been a good dream'  
'Yeah' she smiled  
'Actually, just had a stupid idea'  
'Yeah? Like making the girl who woke up in the wrong house a coffee?' Kate jokingly asked  
'That too' James smiled  
'So...?' Kate said with raised eyebrows  
'So what?'  
'Exactly?'  
'What?'  
'What was your stupid idea?' Kate asked, exasperated  
'Ah that. It was us'  
'What?'  
'Together, as a couple'  
'What about Ben and Candy?'  
'Eh, they've got each other' James dismissed  
'Well it sounds good to me' Kate grinned as she snuggled up to James

'Why do Mondays exist?' James complained loudly  
'Because we need a day to sober up for' Kate grinned cheekily as she joked  
'You perfect little smartass' James grinned as he hugged the new light of his life  
'You love it' she smirked  
'How'd you know?' James asked just before kissing her  
'Tone it down lover boy, the bus is coming' Kate said, slightly breathless

'You two! Do some work!' the math teacher complained  
'We are sir' both James and Kate protested at the same time  
'Sorry, force of habit' the old teacher grinned as he saw the young couple actually working for once, with their left hands grasped beneath the table  
'Ahh, young love...' he muttered  
James' phone buzzed, he put his pen down and checked his phone  
"Ben

DUDE WTF?????"  
James typed a reply

"Ben

I think I know what you mean.  
You should have just been with Candy to begin with instead of hurting both your girlfriend and your best friend"  
His phone buzzed again he was able to put it back on the table, he didn't bother to check it, he could guess that it was something like  
"Ben

How'd you know?  
It's been going on for a while.  
Candy and I have been together under your nose  
Why else do you think she rejected you dumbass?"  
James laid his head on the table, closed his eyes, and sighed. He had gained an amazing girlfriend who would probably hold him back from the suicidal beast inside, in the 2 days that they had been dating, he had been the most sober he had been for years! But, he had lost two of his other best friends, which hurt about as much as the emotional wounds where they had stabbed him in the back. He opened his eyes to see Kate's beautiful brown eyes staring into his  
'You ok?' she asked, her lovely voice floating around in his head  
He moved his head forward to kiss her, but she moved away slightly  
'Not until you tell me what's wrong' she said, frowning  
'He knows.....' James replied, sighing  
'Well we haven't exactly been subtle' Kate grinned  
'Still...'  
'James, lighten up, you have me' Kate grinned as she kissed him  
'Right, you can't call that work! Tongues back in mouths, pens out, and do some god damn calculus!' the teacher yelled jokingly as the class laughed, so, with one last peck, James and Kate sat upright and continued work.

As they sat down at their spot, a quiet corner of the quad, James' phone buzzed, again, he looked at the lock screen  
"12 unread messages", he sighed and put his phone back in his pocket. Kate took his phone out of his pocket and looked through the unread messages  
'Umm James, look at this' Kate asked  
'How do you know my password?' he replied, placing his head on her shoulder so he could see his own phone  
'I can spell my own name you know' she laughed 'But seriously, look at this' she showed me the screen  
"Ben

Dude, there's been a HUGE misunderstanding" the first text read  
"Ben

We need to talk, can you guys meet us on the library roof?'  
James tensed as he saw that, it was the library roof he almost killed himself on, he scratched the scars on his fingers as he read the next message  
"Ben

Well I'm here, where the fuck are you?"  
His hand started nervously twitching, Kate covered it with her own hand  
'James, calm' she comforted him by holding his twitching hand and sitting on his lap, resting her head on his shoulder  
He kissed her on the cheek then continued reading the remainder of the messages, they were all  
"Ben

Dude, fucking come, now!"  
Except the last, the last was

"Candy

James, dude, please, come here, we need to talk. What you saw, it's not what you think..."  
'Come on, let's go' Kate said softly  
'You're the one on my lap'

As they walked, each with an arm around the other, they saw the other two sitting on the roof.  
'So?' James asked  
'So...' Ben said as he stood up  
'What do you want Ben?' James said, anger barely being held in check by Kate's small hand clenching his  
'Dude, you know I would never have done what you think I did, you're my best friend, I couldn't, and Kate, babe, I know we were having problems, but still? How could you believe I'd do that?'  
'I-Eh-I...' Kate stuttered nervously, I tightened my hold on her hand  
'So what did fucking happen then!' James couldn't help raising his voice, he was too sober for this shit..  
'Candy was originally going to ask you out today! But then on Friday you freaked her out by asking her first, so she came to me, wondering what to do, I said to avoid you for the weekend, let you chill a bit, then talk honestly with you on Monday, today. Little did I know you'd hook up with my fucking girlfriend!!'  
Kate buried her head in James' chest as Ben yelled  
'Candy, is this true, Candy, Candy!' James called to no avail  
He and Kate walked over to Candy, who was sitting with her head in her hands. James tapped her on the shoulder  
'Candy, you alright?', she didn't respond  
'James, James look at this' Kate showed James an empty box of prescription painkillers, it was then that he noticed the empty foil sheets laying around the place  
'Candy, what have you done?' he muttered as Kate again buried her face in his chest  
Then James realised something. A few broken cable ties laid around. He carefully eased away from Kate and checked Candy's pulse, paying close attention for any marks on her wrist and neck. As he suspected, both had rectangular bands around them, it wasn't an overdose that killed her (james could swear he saw some white specks on the ground below), she was choked. James moved slowly between Ben and Kate  
'Dude, I wish you'd just tell the truth...' James sighed, trying to convey calmness instead of his true emotions of fear, anger, and excitement  
'Says you, you lying cunt....' Ben hissed 'Kate was all I had, you took her from me, I'm broken, you broke me. SO DIE!!!'  
Ben charged at James with a knife that somehow went unnoticed before,  
'NOOO' Kate screamed and dived in front of James  
The knife disappeared into her thin frame. Her blood poured over Ben's hand and onto the ground. Ben's momentum kept him going forwards, pushing Kate into James. James fell backwards towards the edge that he thought they were further away from. He barely managed to again grab the gutter as Ben moved past him, screaming, crying for help, pointless as he toppled over the side and fell screaming to his death. Kate was lying half over the edge. James screamed as she slid the rest of the way, falling silently and gracefully to her doom. James watched the crimson blood run down his arms, a familiar sight, he thought of his recently deceased friends.  
'I'm coming for you guys. Kate and Candy, I'll accompany you into the gates of wherever we go. Ben however, I'll catch up to you so I can kick you towards the darkest possible corner of hell, you'll pay for what you've done' James prayed to the spirits of his closest friends.  
Then he let go.


End file.
